Hypnochimps Crazyland

2011-09-17T01:36:00.001+01:00

Crikey! The most astonishing designer cushions I have ever seen at CushyWushy.com you really should clap your eyes on them!

2010-01-05T10:57:00.001Z

We've enjoyed the most amazing Silent Disco Party in the UK all thanks to Silent Disco London they really are the best in the business!

2007-10-24T18:14:00.001+01:00

2007-09-25T16:44:00.000+01:00

Ladies and gentlemen I bring you the wonder of Miracle Fruit

2006-09-15T17:35:00.000+01:00

Golly, not much going on at ChimpArmy yet eh? Well in the meantime have a look at the website I made for my local boozer, the rather wonderful Chequers Bickley

2006-07-20T17:11:00.000+01:00

Hypnochimp's Crazyland is saying goodbye for now folks - and turning into the all new CHIMPARMY.COM

2006-07-17T15:36:00.000+01:00

Alan looks after the house

2006-07-07T16:56:00.000+01:00

Crouch and Rooney have a system...

2006-07-03T19:56:00.000+01:00

Only the Jamaicans can laugh like this...

2006-06-30T17:46:00.000+01:00

The real honda ad

2006-06-25T10:29:00.000+01:00

Nutter complaining about a 'rogue helicopter pilot', its funnier than it sounds

2006-06-12T15:51:00.000+01:00

2006-06-08T16:10:00.000+01:00

2006-06-08T14:33:00.000+01:00

2006-05-28T16:35:00.000+01:00

Noel Edmonds imitating a "spaz" on "Deal Or No Deal"

2006-05-28T16:34:00.000+01:00

2006-05-28T16:21:00.000+01:00

2006-05-23T09:48:00.000+01:00

2006-05-22T11:10:00.000+01:00

2006-05-19T17:18:00.000+01:00

2006-05-19T09:10:00.000+01:00

Old school Jazz video mashed with Hip-hop

2006-05-11T10:32:00.000+01:00

Alice Cooper - Generation Landslide 2006

2006-05-05T09:57:00.000+01:00

Hell Pizza are a New Zealand based chain who's pizza boxes fold up into coffins after you've eaten to take the 'remains' ha! design winner

2006-05-05T09:49:00.000+01:00

They are made out of meat

2006-05-03T09:00:00.000+01:00

Japanese Paintball company makes teddy-on-a-parachute firing guns! Woo

clicky here

2006-05-03T08:49:00.000+01:00

We've all heard of Wikipedia - the online encyclopedia which anyone can edit, well Rob Manuel has created Sickipedia to host his alarmingly large collection of Sick Jokes (soon to be published as a book wiv pickturs n'that) it will help you while away at least one hour of you wage slavery today (some of it is really rather offensive so be warned)

2006-04-28T08:49:00.000+01:00

Endorse-it-In-Dorset 2006 Launched

Roll up Roll up my muckers from Bournemouth way Pronghorn have launched their third annual festi with an exceedingly good line up, and at £55 for an adult weekend pass you can't go wrong really - if you want to work on the legendary Kent crew let me know through the usual channels. Festival website here. That is all.

2006-04-25T09:54:00.000+01:00

Chimp Films Go Viral

Well a few exciting weeks it has been my fur-faced brethren, as some of you know I began posting some of my video clips from TV pilots that I made a while back online. For a bit of a laugh I stuck them on b3ta.com where they proved rather popular, Rob Manuel liked them so much he put them in their newsletter (readership of 179,200 more than the chimp newsletter) hence me recieving 30,000+ hits on the videos i.e. they were viewed more in the last fortnight then this site has been in TWO EFFING YEARS online. Its all rather inspiring and I'm now looking to produce more independant short film. For those of you in need of a catch up...
'David Blaine'
'David Blaine' Pt.2
'David Beckham'
'Eminem'
'Tatu'

2006-04-10T09:46:00.000+01:00

2006-04-06T09:27:00.000+01:00

Me doing some hypnosis in Portobello Market a year or two back...

2006-04-05T08:48:00.000+01:00

Some genius has discovered that the BT will read out your text messages if they are sent to a landline, who does the voiceover? Loony ex-Dr. Who Tom Baker no less, any way they got his voice added backing music and got him to sing some classics, my favourite is common People

2006-03-24T11:15:00.000Z

Some sheer ballonery

and one featuring king chimp himself

2006-03-24T08:44:00.000Z

Something which I should have added to my linkbar ages ago is BoingBoing and no gentlemen it is not a boob orientated wonder site, it is far far better, how can I describe it, its like a daily online newspaper with some really fascinating stuff on it, you wont find it all interesting but theres normally a few things a day worth clicking.

2006-03-24T08:43:00.000Z

Some Hedgehogs fought on in the hills unaware that the war had ended

2006-03-22T16:43:00.000Z

2006-03-22T16:42:00.001Z

2006-03-22T16:42:00.000Z

2006-03-17T10:02:00.000Z

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

2006-03-15T09:17:00.001Z

Below is a load of stuff that I've been working on for B3ta.com whilst obviously not updating this site, enjoy!

2006-03-15T09:17:00.000Z

2006-03-15T09:16:00.001Z

2006-03-15T09:16:00.000Z

2006-03-15T09:14:00.000Z

Harry had to admit, even at Hogwarts the telly was shit

2006-02-14T10:50:00.000Z

2006-01-31T15:32:00.000Z

Guilt written all over his face

2006-01-25T09:34:00.000Z

I present to you the absurdly talented Mr AND Mrs. Wheatley their page will have you going for about an hour I'd say So I wont make another post till at least 10.36

2006-01-24T18:51:00.000Z

Make a noble fruit-hat for your cat

2006-01-23T14:30:00.000Z

Anti-George Galloway site. twat.

2006-01-23T11:47:00.000Z

2006-01-12T09:46:00.000Z

Kippered!

2006-01-06T11:49:00.000Z

2006-01-04T14:40:00.000Z

2006-01-04T10:43:00.000Z

Ohhh another treat from Scare Tactics this time its the mob (when oh when will they make a British version of this?)

2006-01-04T10:42:00.000Z

Fantastic Polaroid Prank

2006-01-03T14:31:00.000Z

Florence Nightingale wasn't all she was cracked up to be

2006-01-03T14:25:00.000Z

AK-87

2006-01-03T14:24:00.000Z

HAPPY 2006 CHIMPSQuite simply the best blonde joke ever

2005-12-30T10:23:00.000Z

The best scare-tactics episode yet, corpse in the bath

2005-12-30T09:49:00.000Z

EVIL

2005-12-30T09:48:00.000Z

Top ten facts you didn't know

2005-12-30T09:45:00.000Z

Christ, nearly a month without posting, well tis the season to be binge drinking, Merry Chr... oh thats already happened, Happy New Year y'all linky

2005-12-12T08:44:00.000Z

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces
attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with
rugged, masculine features.

When she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol, set on
fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump up his arse.

2005-12-03T13:01:00.000Z

2005-11-28T19:28:00.000Z

Private Joke

2005-11-27T15:10:00.000Z

The Cutie Bunch Friendly Pal pack

2005-11-27T14:53:00.000Z

2005-11-24T18:46:00.000Z

Blam! Blam! Mutha F@cka

2005-11-24T18:43:00.000Z

Banned Xbox 360 advert, apparently it encouraged the 'shooting of other people' I reckon its cule

2005-11-24T18:42:00.000Z

Facking Crikey people, I'm pinning down a full time job and still making posts. Well thats because I saw this film and decided to become a moral man (SFW)

2005-11-21T08:53:00.000Z

Back from the dead

2005-11-21T08:50:00.000Z

Nearly 6,200 people have succeeded in eating the 72oz. steak (since 1960).

Almost 37,000 people have attempted to consume the free 72oz. steak (since 1960).

yuk!

2005-11-21T08:49:00.000Z

2nd December, are you in training?

2005-11-21T08:40:00.000Z

The Greatest musical comebacks of all time

2005-11-19T12:05:00.000Z

The Chimp is proud to present this year's Christmas No. 1 Remember you heard it here first.

2005-11-14T11:37:00.000Z

The Latest Pensioner

2005-11-14T11:36:00.000Z

The most cringe worthy X-factor loser to date

2005-11-11T12:34:00.000Z

Victor Willis, who was the "cop" in the Village
People, is on the run from the cops in
California. He was arrested after police found
crack cocaine, a loaded gun and "drug
paraphernalia" in his Corvette. Willis posted
$100,000 bail, but disappeared and has not been
found since. He's even made it on to America's
Most Wanted list. Presumably he was concerned
that his prison time would involve lots of
large sexually frustrated men queuing up for
a celebrity shag.

2005-11-11T09:00:00.001Z

Penn & Teller investigate the US Patriot Act witht their unique slant on things, its funny but quite a long clip...

2005-11-11T09:00:00.000Z

Star wars bloopers

2005-11-11T08:32:00.000Z

I reckon this is this year's Number 1 christmas prezzie

2005-11-11T08:17:00.000Z

Only a woman could possibly do this mind you, it would make quite a good movie wouldn't it?

2005-11-10T10:52:00.000Z

2005-11-09T12:21:00.000Z

Damn interesting dot com - it will have you reading for at least an hour.

2005-11-09T11:10:00.000Z

2005-11-09T09:03:00.000Z

Trampolines are painful

2005-11-09T09:00:00.000Z

Great short from the US show 'scare tactics' desert fun

2005-11-09T08:33:00.000Z

Someone with not only far too much time on their hands but an awful lot of loot builds the ultimate home cinema

2005-11-07T10:41:00.000Z

send an e-mail time capsule to yourself

2005-11-07T09:31:00.000Z

Simply painful to watch Bobby brown and Mike Tyson singing the monster mash, gah!

2005-11-07T09:17:00.000Z

Dancing with pride at the basketball match (SFW)

2005-11-04T08:39:00.000Z

Coluring in - anyone else spot Posh about five or six down?
prob NSFW

2005-11-04T08:37:00.000Z

Crazy woman

2005-11-01T11:42:00.000Z

2005-10-29T10:05:00.000+01:00

Well hullooo everybody, I'm finally back from my month of being an idle sod in other countries (as opposed to being one here at home). October has indeed been a good larf and involved an above average amount of swimming and drinking. Oh and I found this thingermajig today...

My blog is worth $2,822.70.
How much is your blog worth?

pah! - I'm worth millions

2005-10-17T08:22:00.000+01:00

Meet the newest members of the Chimp army, these ladies qualified by having the amazing ability to cut the grass, do two things at once and have an astounding insight into the offside rule. If I didn't know better I'd say they were fellas!

2005-09-26T09:57:00.000+01:00

Photo-shop genius and full time B3tan Beau Bo D'or has opened his own website, its well worth a look around, cast your eyes over the 'nicked section' and it will make you realise just how popular his stuff is Linky

2005-09-26T09:17:00.000+01:00

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" "Well... are you religious?" He said yes. I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant ? "Protestant." "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist" "Wow! Me too!
Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?" "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too!
Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.

2005-09-19T09:55:00.000+01:00

Avast ye scurvy Dogs its international talk like a pirate day

2005-09-19T08:19:00.000+01:00

Admit it: You want to be the sole survivor of an airline disaster. You aren't looking for a disaster to happen, but if it does, you see yourself coming through it. I'm here to tell you that you're not out of touch with reality—you can do it. Sure, you'll take a few hits, and I'm not saying there won't be some sweaty flashbacks later on, but you'll make it. You'll sit up in your hospital bed and meet the press. Refreshingly, you will keep God out of your public comments, knowing that it's unfair to sing His praises when all of your dead fellow-passengers have no platform from which to offer an alternative view. clicky click

2005-09-18T09:39:00.000+01:00

Before her untimely death Mo mowlam was booked to do a speaking tour of the country, see how one venue chose to sensitively deal with her passing (scroll down) thanks to B3ta...